An advert for BeautifulPeople.com, the elite dating site for beautiful people only, which launches in the Middle East today - where, incidentally, if you even considered dressing or disporting yourself in the above way, you'd be flogged and jailed, where, frankly, being "BeautifulPeople" and 'perty' is a distinct disadvantage.
Welcome! Willkommen! Merhaba! Shalom! Bienvenue! Bienvenidos! etc.
So, you've had a hard day sifting through life's nit comb for any meaning to the day - either that, or the last 10 minutes slaving over a hot microwave trying to create one of your signature dishes - and you now need to relax and have a laugh.
Welcome to Cosmic Navel Lint - where life's small irritations are put into perspective. Feel free to comment and ask questions!
NB: Sorry to break the news to you, but unless otherwise imagined, none of what follows is set to music - that Polka's only inside your head!
Polite, accommodating, flexible, erudite and warm - are all ways in which people have described my twin brother. My name's Bren Tierney, I'm a native of the UK and find life and people endlessly enthralling - usually to the point of amusement. Here's where I write about it.